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As I promised you a few weeks ago, Rosie and I were going to tell you how we survived our ordeal as Astro Cop’s hostages and how we liberated ourselves from his clutches.

–           We got inspired by ‘Argo’, the movie with Ben Affleck.

–           Oh boy we did, Sis, we did.

–           We had to mingle toaster, TV and psychic particles.

–           T’was scary.

–           But my scientist background saved us.

–           Don’t forget my movies backgrounds had a strong part in our freedom too.

–           You’re conceited, Brother.  Without my psychic power and physicist knowledge, you would still be stuck there.  I came back for you once I was able to get out myself.

–           And if I hadn’t called my friend Ben Affleck to convince the TV particles that we were mere Hollywood particles, the TV would never have taken us on and the transfer could never have occurred.

–           And if you’d never boasted that you were ‘real news’ to the newsreader in it, I wouldn’t have had to come back to get you out pretending I was a psychiatrist from ‘Nurses & Doctors’ and inject the both of us through a dialysis machine to ensure we were considered urinated material.

–           You irretrievably and irremediably damaged the plasma TV when we got out.

–           You’re ungrateful, Feralbulb.  How can you do readings when—

–           —Fuck, Rosie!  Enough!  The readers know all they need to know; can I do my reading while you learn to look pretty and shut up?

–           Well folks, she’s gone again, sorry.  In a huff.  But that’s Rosie, what can you expect?  She’ll be back.  Today we’re going to do read for Kathryn Bigelow.

Dear Kathryn,

You are born on 27 November 1951, you are a Sagittarian.  A few cards only and already there are numerous themes coming up in your draw:

1.         Firstly, ‘Zero Dark Thirty’ brings no surprises here: you’ll get an award.  Not the one you might expect, however, but one all the same.  This doesn’t affect you because you do movies displaying in them what you believe in.  There is a sense of loss at the moment, as if all this excitement about directing dies off each time you’re ‘off the hook’ to rest and ponder what next.  Not that the pondering ever extends for any length of time.  There’s always more that you can do and you don’t like to stop.  You draw wisdom and sheer intuition from the depths of your being and you can see through people and their intentions and want.  Your non-judgemental approach tells us heaps about your characters and yourself.  With your next movie, you’ll wish to change: no more war themes for one or two movies.  You want something lighter as even you need to rest.

2.         Secondly, you need to watch the people/public around you.  You made a strong movie bringing subjects close to many people’s heart.  But some people aren’t inspired.  They are resentful and they hide their feelings from you.  I believe you have or are receiving death threats on top of some officials accusing you of exaggerating and lying and, as tough as you might be, you must gather your strength and not let it affect you.  Your talent resides in making people believe that you think in black and white… yet nothing is as it seems as you are in fact multi-faceted.  You know this and you only let those close to you get an inkling of all the different shades of grey (and not just grey) you keep locked within yourself.  In seeing this, Ma’am, I’m looking forward to what it is next you might bring to the big screen.

Oh Ma’am!  But of course: do take time out.  It’s time to celebrate and time to have fun with your close friends.  Why feel guilty about it?  It’s not uninspired to do so, it won’t take away from you.  You’ll never be short of ideas.  On the contrary: get out and let your hair down, it’s always needed because it does stimulate the imagination.

Ms Big-low, with all due respect, why is it you fear not being in touch with what is popular?  You’re also afraid to end up alone at some point… though this is something you don’t like to admit because you’re so busy that indeed you wonder how life could supply you with a charming influence, be it friend or lover or both.  I hear you.  Well no, it’s never too late.  God dammit woman!: it’s never too late to learn the ‘way’ again.  What way?  That of being in love, loved and loving.  Accept it because it’s coming to you big way now, Ma’am.  Yeah, even you a true feminist at heart.  Don’t squirm.  I just say that.  You know what I mean.

As to your wishes and hope, I have a nice sequence of events here: victory and fighting to keep your rights over it; not letting yourself being affected by whatever others might say or think.  There are plenty more victories to come if this one doesn’t exactly turn the way you want it.  Yes, you think you made a hard facts movie.  The thing is, a lot of people will react emotionally to it as they feel hard done by one way or another.  This movie is going to be seeped in more controversy than you ever thought it would be.  However, somewhere, somehow, it is indicated that justice might be brought for those who go too far in trying to dispute your beliefs and/or that torture and its surrounding laws might get a good shake up and be revised, tightened, just like the right to own weapons in the US might get a good shake up.  Your movie isn’t in vain and you feel it already.

At the time of doing this reading, I haven’t read anything about you on the web except comments on your latest movie.  So it is interesting to see that you come from a very nurturing environment, very soft, very emotional and very, very sensitive.  No hard talk, no tough and unwelcome ideas to hurt who you are and although your upbringing, I sense, may have been unconventional, it was always done with your welfare and well-being being considered, at all levels.  You always remain calm and poised in all circumstances anyway as your consciousness overextends and ‘soaks’ itself into realms only few of us have access to.

For now, I’d recommend to stop being on the defensive and to look at things from a different perspective: let life unfold.  Take your well-deserved rest and enjoy.  It’s like the next few months and all the blabber that surrounds you and your movie controversy will die down… let it go, let it happen.

Best at the moment is to think rationally, that’s what’s going to get you through.  Seek the help of male friends.  One in particular who can help you see clearly through things as you feel a little uninspired in some respects.  There’s nothing more you love than a ground shaking conversation that brings on new ideas and cuts through what needs to be cut through.  There’s a man around you in particular who stands taller than all the others.  Trust him.  He means no harm.  Talk to him.  Who am I talking about?: he wears a large colourful stone ring on his left hand middle finger.  Also, although his emotions are well guarded and kept under check, a part of him loves to ‘communicate’ with nature and he needs to sometimes be alone in nature/talk long walks/travel to see the world and how it really is as opposed to something with a rosy and fake vision.  Now you’re told.

Lastly, it seems you’re not embracing changes at the moment and that you’re better off living your life in the present.  It seems you’re far from home or that you’re often called away from your home and this weighs on you at times.  Not only this, you sometimes wonders where your home is.  Well, stop the questions.  Don’t go home if you’re not sure and don’t even think about it.  You’re not alone in wondering where home is: there are numerous souls who belong to several places at the same time.  I mean, the world is their oyster so make it yours too and stop those nagging, useless questions.  We’re not all the same.  Our lives, as you know, are all very different from one another, despite appearances and one must learn to live with that.

Well, as to your next movie, I did say not another war story a little earlier, didn’t I?  And I’d be right because next comes the story of a war raging inside one single soul who wonders all his/her life what would have happened if he/she had dared moving out of his/her small village but never did.  So that person’s life, which is ending, is going in flashes before its eyes, as you show your public what was imagined and what was real and how that dying person dealt with it.  Very beautiful, very insightful.  War has many facets and you’ll know how to demonstrate this with successful results too.

Well that it’s for today, Ma’am.  I wish you a good week.